The Cave is a section for all the bits and pieces that don't seem to fit in any other section on the site. Sometimes we are sent  articles and ideas for things that are relevant to living with a BPI, but are not necessarily medical or anatomical or even slightly useful...but deserve a place to exist. The Cave  represents that place we all go to from time to time just to quietly reflect on life, or rant and rage....or both....

ARTICLE; Analysis of TBPI Discussion Boards

ARTICLE; What Psychotherapists Should Know about Disability
Guide to life.    By Liz

1: When invited for a meal at a friend's house, as a BPI, you have THE perfect excuse to get out of washing the dishes........

2 ...AND drying them.

3; Swimming in perfect circles is dead easy...should you want to that is...! (Well, it works for me and keeps the kids in the local pool amused...)

4; This one is for ladies and cross-dressers only; you get to try out and/or invent new and very interesting yoga positions while trying to do up your bra, put tights on etc. etc.

5; AT LAST! NO MORE MAKING A FOOL OF YOURSELF doing the 'Birdie Song', 'Agadoo', and for those old enough to remember it, 'The Okey Cokey'... (Thanks Marc! I am forever in your debt!) However, Riverdance is an entirely different prospect...

6 ;( My personal favourite this one...) As a BPI'er, you have the PERFECT chat-up line at your disposal; when you find yourself faced with a buffet table at a party, BBQ, or wedding reception, or any sort of social gathering, you can approach the best looking man (or lady..!) and say something like ..'excuse me, you look like a kind person, I wonder if you can help me with this...I have lost the use of one arm and sometimes these things (indicate the table at this point) have nowhere to put a plate down...' anyway, you get the picture!! I won't go into all the occasions where this can be useful; I'll leave it up to your imagination...but, believe me, this WORKS! Keep an eye open for girlfriend/boyfriend of your target/victim, and all should go smoothly and hey presto! you've found a new friend (or whatever..) and had a good lunch...

7; As a Grandma with a BPI, I have never been expected to change a nappy (diaper) for which I am eternally grateful; I was never very good with my own kids...Daddy did it most of the time; I'm not very good with smells! I get to spoon feed them instead...MUCH more fun!

Well, that's all I've thought of so far -

Meanwhile, I'll leave you with a few thoughts that made me laugh;

BPI Mexican waves...

BPI Hula hoops...
The following articles, written by group members, have been retrieved from the Raspberries section and are reproduced exactly as originally submitted.
Some Positive Thoughts.        By Hazey

Getting caught with puff: plead it's for pain relief, get a good solicitor first (oh how did you all know what my first one would be about!)

Airplane.......BPI gets you good seats on a flight

Ironing: BPI definitely gets you outta that job, pay someone else & don't look lazy or a snob in the bargain, hey I'm a crip!

VIP tickets to major amusement places i.e. Alton towers or Universal studios. Queuing is a thing of the past if you have a BPI, not only do these guys kindly let you in cheaper (sometimes let a carer in free if you lay it on thick!!!!!) but they also direct you to the front of all the queues so you can get round the whole park in one day, you go in the back entrance then come out & go straight back on again! Beware of stares from jealous onlookers who have been queuing 2 hours whilst you're on your 4th ride on the corkscrew!

Good excuse to eat chocolate; no I can't chop up food.

Good excuse to get out of sporting events; Hey where's the bar. Not that I need an excuse!

Bpi version of YMCA /\\\ (LBPI) \/// (RBPI)

More Positive Thoughts.        By Mikey

You get to supervise all household and automotive type repairs...when asked to help, complain a lot...soon you'll be in charge of getting the beer and sandwiches...be sure to point out all the stupid mistakes...

- Always ask to bar tend at parties, weddings, stag and do's etc...Explain that you really want to contribute something...once firmly ensconced behind the bar proceed to drink all the free swill you can possibly choke down...

- you never have to roll a joint again...just casually drop the bag in front of your mates and say, lets smoke a fatty...the best timing for this is when they are all dry...

- When in hospital you get to self medicate the morphine and they usually send you home with more painkillers than you actually need...

- having more than one of each kitchen utensil is redundant and requires excess one handed dishwashing....a note to single bpi's, paper plates save a lot of toil in the kitchen...

- Cute nurses and physical therapists working on you...
- The fearful looks from normal people...
- freaking out store clerks and waiters...
- getting a cool nickname like "the claw " or " the crab "...
- Chicks dig scars...
- You have an excuse for your bad attitude...
- Acceptance of your insanity (most say I haven't changed much)...

Crips Guide to Life with a BPI.      By Jenny

You never have to shake hands with people you don't like

You can get away with outrageous behaviour-people feel bad about chastising crips and people also excuse such behaviour because they assume you have 'issues' to do with the arm...poor deluded fools

We learn the art of smoking and drinking at the same time (BLISS) because of the way we have to hold the beer and fag in one hand

You get to sit down on the tube

You don't feel obliged to clap at crap gigs

You never have to peel potatoes (remember-not peeling spuds is an advantage, as is not being able to open tins, chop meat, cut bread-forget the ingenious gadgets, eat junk food)

You can freak people out with it

The muscle wastage trims pounds off your weight

You never have to jive with your pissed uncle at family gatherings

Your kid's mates are really impressed with the arm

....and I just asked Pete if there were any advantages for him- he said it was great I could only hit him with one hand!



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