Getting caught with puff: plead it's for pain relief, get a good solicitor first (oh how did you all know what my first one would be about!)
Airplane.......BPI gets you good seats on a flight
Ironing: BPI definitely gets you outta that job, pay someone else & don't look lazy or a snob in the bargain, hey I'm a crip!
VIP tickets to major amusement places i.e. Alton towers or Universal studios. Queuing is a thing of the past if you have a BPI, not only do these guys kindly let you in cheaper (sometimes let a carer in free if you lay it on thick!!!!!) but they also direct you to the front of all the queues so you can get round the whole park in one day, you go in the back entrance then come out & go straight back on again! Beware of stares from jealous onlookers who have been queuing 2 hours whilst you're on your 4th ride on the corkscrew!
Good excuse to eat chocolate; no I can't chop up food.
Good excuse to get out of sporting events; Hey where's the bar. Not that I need an excuse!
Bpi version of YMCA /\\\ (LBPI) \/// (RBPI)
